If you saw me today, you would never guess that I’m a bona fide, time-served, witch.
I had intended to arrive on the busy street with great decorum, but had descended at a greater speed than planned, and hit the ground like a whirling dervish.
I looked around confidently, calculating that nobody would pay any attention to me.
I casually put my aluminium folding broomstick, the latest development in free flying technology, under my cloak.
When I say cloak, I mean the fabulous designer label robe I had bought on the Salem High Street for the occasion.
I chose the cloak with great care and attention to detail. Although practical, it was stunning. The glittering flowing fabric billowed on descent. There were plenty of deep pockets for essentials: spell book, toads, miniature potion bottles.
It has the latest Teflon coating, so shiny, that any bird dross I couldn’t avoid whilst airborne would slide off as I bumped down on landing.
The neckline of the deep purple velvet dress I wore underneath was cut low to show off my eye-catching necklace. A family heirloom, passed down through generations. A solid gold chain with teeth, claws, and bones, attached by tiny gold rings.
Have I mentioned the shoes? They pinch a bit, but were a must have for a serious minded enchantress. They sparkle as I walk. The shiniest bright red shoes – the kind dreams are made of. I bought them on e-bay from a site called http://www.dorothy-kansas.com
I took out my compact mirror to check my appearance, and I was pleased to see my complexion was a teensy bit greener than yesterday.
The autonomous wart on my hooked nose, which seems to know instinctively when to grow into a hideous protuberance was at its best, or some would say worst.
I straightened up, well as best as a bent crone can, adjusted my 13th century antique conical hat, and cackled loudly as I sashayed down the street.
I dipped into my hex bag, uttered some hocus pocus and abracadabra chants, and waved my titanium wand with a flourish. I went from door to door, casting my spells, filling my pockets with gold, jewellery, and coins.
Everyone was laughing and smiling, and many complimented me on my lifelike appearance.
What a hoot, as my owl would say. It’s Halloween again. The one day a year when I can walk amongst humankind without drawing adverse attention to myself.